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LOLWalls - LOLMac
u can has RDA
lolmac
lolmac
LOLWalls

Mebbe deres invizibul writing on dem.
(This caption was stolen directly from icanhazcheezburger.)
(You may now feel free to write crackfic about Daniel Ascending into cat form.)
icanhastofu.com
Episode:   Threads, Season 8          Screen Capture from:  stargatecaps.com

In case anyone missed the announcement a couple of days ago:  Tuesday will be a particularly significant day for LOLMac.  And only one person has made any attempt to guess why.  Snif.  Nobody cares . . .  :-(
If you make a guess, PM me please -- if you guess in a comment, I'll have to screen the comment till after Tuesday.

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Comments
campylobacter From: campylobacter Date: 22nd April 2011 16:58 (UTC) (Link)
I have my LJ notifs set to alert me for only those lolmac posts tagged "jack o'neill", so of course I missed an announcement without that tag. I'm one of those people who never reads their Friends Page.

Edited at 2011-04-22 16:59 (UTC)
lolmac From: lolmac Date: 23rd April 2011 01:40 (UTC) (Link)
*very tempted to really mess up the tags*

Just be grateful that I've vowed to use my powers for Good. Or occasionally, Naughty.
lothithil From: lothithil Date: 22nd April 2011 17:31 (UTC) (Link)
The Stargate would have been a more interesting place if the wormhole transported only people and not clothing.

Scarier, too, in a lot of cases! lol!
lolmac From: lolmac Date: 23rd April 2011 01:41 (UTC) (Link)
*visualises entire SG-1 team nekkid*

*passes out happily*
campylobacter From: campylobacter Date: 23rd April 2011 02:19 (UTC) (Link)
(Shh! Don't give the TSA any more ideas.)
hermit From: hermit Date: 22nd April 2011 23:37 (UTC) (Link)
I care! *hugs you*

I just have no freaking clue what it could be. LOL
lolmac From: lolmac Date: 23rd April 2011 01:42 (UTC) (Link)
*hugs you back* *g*
thothmes From: thothmes Date: 23rd April 2011 03:41 (UTC) (Link)
I just want to state for the record that "does not have a freakin' clue" is not the same as "does not care".

I did go so far as to check the profile with a mind to checking if it was an anniversary the date of the founding of the journal, which I figured was an unlikely as being a bit too obvious but non-zero possibility, but when that turned out to be off the money, I gave up.

I love the fact that Daniel (at least as long as this cap is paired with this caption) looks indignant that Jack is finding the wall more interesting than him!

How cruel of you to tempt me with AscendedDaniel!Cat crackfic, when I have overdue fic I really, really need to be working on! ;)
lolmac From: lolmac Date: 23rd April 2011 03:43 (UTC) (Link)
purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr . . . meow.
thothmes From: thothmes Date: 23rd April 2011 05:43 (UTC) (Link)

I'm Weak. So Weak.

Ohhhh, The Cat Came Back...



Sam had made Brigadier and was freshly installed as the general in charge of the SGC when Daniel died yet again. Teal'c had been on a leave of absence, off helping with Rya'c's election campaign, so Colonel Mitchell, Vala, and a Lieutenant Gibbons had been the only witnesses. Cam, grey with guilt and anguish had explained that there had been no possibility of him surviving or of retrieving the body. The lava flow had been too sudden, and too hot. Daniel had been at the end of the line, and was the only one caught in it. Vala had been mute with grief, and her attempt to hide it behind a wobbly, teary smile fooled no one. Lieutenant Gibbons had said that he had turned at Daniel's cry, seen the lava start to roll over him, and that it was so hot that he had instantly burnt up in a bright flash of light, and then he had lost his lunch all over his combat boots, right there in the Gate Room in front of all the Marines.

Sam sent them all off to the infirmary, and then, with shaking hands, put a call through to the Pentagon. He needed to know.

"Sir," she said, thinking correctly that if she made this a "sir" call and not a "Jack" call, she might, just might get through this without breaking, "We've lost Daniel again."

General O'Neill seemed remarkably calm, considering.

"He's like the cat in that song," he said. "He'll be back."

How prophetic.

Some three weeks later, General O'Neill was in town to make his annual inspection of the SGC. Teal'c was back too, proud of his son's electoral success, and declaring his three year old grandson to be showing signs that he would grow to be a formidable warrior like his father.

When the remnants of SG-1 and General O'Neill (minus the lowly Lieutenant who discovered another obligation as soon as he heard how rare the air was going to be at pizza night this time) knocked on Carter's door that afternoon, they were concerned to find her looking a bit shaken.

"General Carter, you appear unwell," said Teal'c breaking the silence.

"What gives, Carter?" asked O'Neill.

"I have a new cat," she replied.

"Yeah. Heisenburg. We know," said Cam.

"No. This is a new new cat."

"Ooookay," said Jack. "And this is a problem because..."

"I can't pick him up," she said. "He just showed up inside the house, when he wasn't there when I left for work today, and I can't pick him up."

"Perhaps he just needs to get used to you," offered Vala brightly. "If you buy him a can of tuna instead of that nasty dry stuff, maybe he will be more-"

"No, you don't understand. It's physically impossible to pick him up. I just..." She made repeated upward motions of both hands, side by side and moving together. She looked rather pitifully at General O'Neill. "I think maybe I need to be relieved of my command, sir. I'm thinking of taking up knitting."

O'Neill gave a frown of concern, and placed his hands firmly in either pocket, a sure sign that he didn't want them semaphoring anything that the others might be able to interpret.

"I think you better show us this cat, Carter."

Carter, grimacing, and if anything a bit paler, gestured towards the kitchen, visible from the front hall.

"There he is now, sir."

A sleek well-muscled cat with an unusual coat of reddish brown fur and startling blue eyes jumped off the dark granite counter, and proceeded to walk through the central island. As in when he emerged, his head came through the solid wood, followed by the rest of his body. Through. He stalked up to Vala, walked figure eights around and between her legs, went to Mitchell and delicately sniffed his leg, jumped from there to the back of the living room couch and from there to Teal'c shoulder, and then down again, to stand over Jack's right sneaker, where he proceeded to noisily and convincingly hawk up an invisible hairball - all the sound was there, all the motion, no actual result.

There was silence as all present exchanged glances. Jack was the first to find his voice.

"As much as I'd like that sweater with the one arm longer than the other, Carter," said Jack, "I don't think your nuts, I'm not relieving you of your command, and I suggest you name him Daniel."

The cat began to purr.


perkyandproud From: perkyandproud Date: 23rd April 2011 09:11 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

Oh, yes. Definitely this :-) LOL!
thothmes From: thothmes Date: 24th April 2011 04:27 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

Thank you!

[wanders off muttering and you think you may have caught "Bwaahahahaaa! My work here is done!"]
lolmac From: lolmac Date: 23rd April 2011 14:30 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

OMGOMGOMG. Effing brilliant.

And don't you feel better now that you've got all that off your chest? The fic, I mean. Not the hairball.

Do you have an ff.net account? If not, can I pleasepleaseplease add this to "The Penguin Guide to Gate Travel"? (I've started posting strange items of crack there, as a running series.) Full attribution and credit and bouquets, of course!
thothmes From: thothmes Date: 24th April 2011 04:14 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

I do have a (largely gloriously unused)ff.net account. I've posted a grand total of one (1) story, because someone else begged me to post a story I wrote there.

I will try to find the time to post it on ff.net tomorrow (think tonight will be a bit too busy here, since we have a still-gullible eight year old, and the bunny needs to make his her rounds), and then I have no objection to your adding a reference to it in the "Penguin Guide to Gate Travel" the next time you post another chapter, for those who might want to find more crack.

My initial reaction was "Gee, I should just let Beth post it in "The Penguin Guide" where it will be easier for crack-lovers to find, but then I realized that 1) it's been a while since I read the TOS, and I have no idea if that would be a violation if I already have an account of my own, and 2) I would be cut out of any feedback that way. I'm not a tireless self-promoter, but I am a curious soul, and not knowing might be Bad.

Oh, and yeah. I feel so much better now that I have that hairball off my chest! My husband's giving me dirty looks and going for the paper towel though. What's the big deal? They were his old beat-up mowing shoes! ;)
From: katxander Date: 23rd April 2011 17:05 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

The ultimate giggle would be that the cat insists in going with Jack...what better way to pester the snot out of him for eternity? Especially since he's a dog person!

Go get him, kitty! Jack legs make EXCELLENT clawing posts.

Meeeeeeee-OW!

Yeah, and Daniel? Lose the flag.

...what?
thothmes From: thothmes Date: 24th April 2011 04:24 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

I just kind of figured (the evidence of Oma Desala carrying baby Shifu aside) that AscendedCat!Daniel, if he could pass through the island, and if Jack's shoe passed right through him the time before in Ba'al's cell, would have a little trouble actually clawing either Jack's legs or Carter's woodwork!

Daniel will instead get Jack back the way cats have done on dog lovers from time immemorial. Firstly he will shed on him profusely, especially if he is in uniform. Jack will never be able to get the hairs to go away because the lint roller will pass right through them. And then there's this:

"Carter! He's staring at me again! Why does he do that?! It gives me the creeps!"

Sam tries to pick him up and relocate him, but her hands go right through. Daniel moves himself several times, always to Jack's line of sight where the staring is most effective. The last time he relocates to Jack's lap, does a little kneading and circling thing, and settles in for a snooze. Jack is totally unable to extricate himself.
From: katxander Date: 24th April 2011 05:09 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

*nods* I love it!! Definitely the staring. Mine used to drive me NUTS with that. I also love that Jack can't lift the Daniel!Cat off of him! HA!!!

Absolutely perfect. Thank you.

^_^
archersangel From: archersangel Date: 25th April 2011 03:09 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

"I think maybe I need to be relieved of my command, sir. I'm thinking of taking up knitting."

i love this line.
thothmes From: thothmes Date: 25th April 2011 03:22 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

Thank you. It seemed in keeping with the tangential way those two approach any meaningful conversation.
sidlj From: sidlj Date: 27th April 2011 16:32 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

Brilliant! The invisible hairball on the shoe makes me think of Grandpa Nick repeating Invisible!Daniel's "Jack, don't be an ass" in Crystal Skull.

When Jack feels the love, he knows Daniel's in the room. :-D

Nice kitty, here kitty!
thothmes From: thothmes Date: 28th April 2011 07:24 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

When Jack feels the love, he knows Daniel's in the room.

And the snarkiness! Don't forget the snarkiness! ;)

Glad you enjoyed.
campylobacter From: campylobacter Date: 27th April 2011 18:29 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

Rec'ed at crackified_gate

List of what I love about this:
1. Sam had made Brigadier OMG YES! (I love Landry, but Sam deserves command when he retires.)
2. Vala had been mute with grief (flashbacks to "The Quest 2")
3. a "sir" call and not a "Jack" call
4. He's like the cat in that song (Jack knows Daniel too well ;D )
5. Teal'c was back too, proud of his son's electoral success (Go Ry'ac!)
6. Heisenburg (ROTFL Sam was probably going to name Daniel!cat "Higgs Boson".)
7. he didn't want them semaphoring anything that the others might be able to interpret LOL
8. walked figure eights around and between her legs (D'aww!)
9. an invisible hairball TRUE LOVE
lolmac From: lolmac Date: 27th April 2011 20:15 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

4. Said song now on its 5th day of intermittent earwormitude.
5. I also adored Teal'c's pride in his grandson.
6. More likely 'Boson Higgs' (who is also a character in Girl Genius).

I didn't know there was a crackified_gate comm! Woohoo!
thothmes From: thothmes Date: 28th April 2011 07:30 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

Thank you so much for the rec.!

9. an invisible hairball TRUE LOVE

Next time, of course, it will be a visible, but equally impossible to pick up mouse, which will greatly disturb Jack, because given what he knows, he will spend the whole night wondering who was just dropped on his shoe. Cat!Daniel will spend the entire night grooming himself with his back resolutely turned toward Jack, because he had no appreciation of his special offering...

[Icon is Jack's reaction to the mouse.]


campylobacter From: campylobacter Date: 28th April 2011 07:40 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

If that mouse is anyone but Adria, Daniel!Cat's gonna get Descended AGAIN. With fleas.
thothmes From: thothmes Date: 28th April 2011 07:51 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

LOL!

Oh, I can see her now, with her delicate little mousie face, and her total refusal to be meek and timid like a proper mousie!
lolmac From: lolmac Date: 28th April 2011 12:39 (UTC) (Link)

now expecting more crackfic

Whether that happens in Sam's house or Jack's, it's going to be an awkward morning.

ETA: I was going to add, "And if you don't write it, I will" . . . but I think I just started writing it . . . helllpppp

Edited at 2011-04-28 13:01 (UTC)
campylobacter From: campylobacter Date: 28th April 2011 16:02 (UTC) (Link)

an awkward morning

You will be providing us the link upon completion.

:D
lolmac From: lolmac Date: 30th April 2011 18:53 (UTC) (Link)

Re: an awkward morning

Yes, ma'am. Currently in progress.
lolmac From: lolmac Date: 7th May 2011 04:23 (UTC) (Link)

Re: an awkward morning

Completed: The Cat Came Back Again

I'm getting it posted to LJ now.
thothmes From: thothmes Date: 28th April 2011 18:58 (UTC) (Link)

Re: now expecting more crackfic

Heh. Revenge of the plot bunny!
lolmac From: lolmac Date: 28th April 2011 12:35 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

Invizibul hairball, intangibul mouse, inaudibul luv.
thothmes From: thothmes Date: 28th April 2011 18:56 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

:)
cleothemuse From: cleothemuse Date: 28th April 2011 18:46 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

ROFLMAO! I envisage Cat!Daniel will leave many visible-yet-unmovable hairs on Jack's uniforms :D
thothmes From: thothmes Date: 28th April 2011 18:55 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

Fortunately when the four-stars at the Pentagon get on his case about it, he will be able to pacify them by offering to show up with fur-free uniforms just as soon as a single one of them is able to lift a single hair off themselves. Then he will suggest that the problem would be a great deal less visible if he were allowed a special dispensation to wear B.D.U.s, and emerge a happy and more comfortable man.
sg_wonderland From: sg_wonderland Date: 9th May 2011 10:11 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

This whole story (all bits of it!) were too hilarious and I know there was a goofy smile on my face for a long time after I read it. Thanks!
thothmes From: thothmes Date: 12th May 2011 18:49 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I'm Weak. So Weak.

I know there was a goofy smile on my face for a long time after I read it.

If That's the case, then I achieved exactly what I set out to achieve. Thank you so much, and sorry to take so long to get around to saying it!
(Deleted comment)
lolmac From: lolmac Date: 23rd April 2011 03:57 (UTC) (Link)
*g* Thank you!

LOL -- that must be it. Invizibal holes in the walls.
perkyandproud From: perkyandproud Date: 23rd April 2011 09:13 (UTC) (Link)
I'm sorry...I do not see any walls...

I see a flag though. Darn it.

:-)

I am sorry I do not know the significance of tomorrow! Is it personally significant or does it have to do with this comm?
lolmac From: lolmac Date: 23rd April 2011 14:30 (UTC) (Link)
If only it had been an invizibul flag!
From: katxander Date: 24th April 2011 05:11 (UTC) (Link)

Toozdae?

Um....oh! (waving upraised hand frantically) *I* know!!

It's the 26th of April!

*proud grin*

I'm right, right??


....whaaaaat?
lolmac From: lolmac Date: 24th April 2011 13:41 (UTC) (Link)

Re: Toozdae?

Well, yes, you're right that it will be the 26th of April. This is not the most significant thing about it from my point of view, but it's undisputedly true.
bull_demon From: bull_demon Date: 24th April 2011 14:24 (UTC) (Link)
I think what disturbs me the most about this picture is that Jack is reaching for the long, slender flag pole, rather than the wall itself...
archersangel From: archersangel Date: 25th April 2011 03:11 (UTC) (Link)
just saw this on THIS network tonight.
ernutet From: ernutet Date: 2nd June 2012 22:31 (UTC) (Link)
Here via FIg's rec...

I totally, utterly cracked at the invisible hairball!

OMG, this needs a Daniel!LOLcat for illustration!

Thank you! ::pokes around for more::


lolmac From: lolmac Date: 2nd June 2012 22:59 (UTC) (Link)
Bless Fig and welcome aboard!! Do wander around as much as you like. I'm afraid the focus of this journal is RDA, but Daniel does turn up as well. ;-) I still post a new LOL every weekday.

The best version of the fic itself -- with all three sections -- is probably the one on Ao3, or the one at bethinexile.livejournal.com. I think that's where Fig's rec points, but I'm not completely certain.
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